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Monday, January 9, 2017

Cover Your Ears, Boys... Let's Talk About Breastfeeding

This has been a hot topic within the circle of my mommy friends for a while.  I joked with one of them last week that I was going to write a blog post about this very topic, so, here it is.  Fair warning, these are my thoughts, and the thoughts of a few of my above mentioned mommy friends.  These certainly aren't the experiences or thoughts of everyone. 

As soon as people find out you are expecting, this seems to be one of the topics that comes up.  Are you going to breastfeed?  You hear the phrase "breast is best" until you think you can't possibly hear it any more.  I, like many bright eyed (while you are newly pregnant and still have energy) pregnant ladies was beyond excited about breastfeeding.  I immediately signed up for the breastfeeding class offered through the hospital, called my health insurance company to confirm my eligibility for a breast pump, and began research on which one would be the best and which accessories I would need. 

We attended breastfeeding class shortly after Labor Day this year, so just a few weeks before miss Isabelle arrived.  I felt certain, after going to class, that I knew everything I needed to know to have a successful breastfeeding journey.  At our last meeting with our Doula, we talked about breastfeeding.  Again, I was sure I would have a wonderful breastfeeding experience; it was going to be beautiful just like they described in class. 

Certainly, there are moments when our breastfeeding journey has been beautiful.  I will even say the good moments outweigh the bad ones.  However, I do think it is a disservice to excited mamas to be to say it's all going to be sunshine and roses.  Not to burst any pregnant ladies bubbles, but it isn't going to be (this is the part where all the breastfeeding mamas out there can nod along in agreement with me).  Hear me out, ladies...

There are going to be times where you think why am I still doing this.  I felt that way in the beginning and I feel that way on at least a weekly basis as I look at the results of my pumping sessions and think seriously, all that work for this...

I know there are mams out there who have an oversupply.  To those mamas I say, I'm totally jealous.  I am not one of those moms.  I know I have said in previous posts that we made the decision early on to supplement formula with Isabelle.  I give her as much as I can, and I know anything I have to offer her is good; liquid gold as the say!  It's hard not to compare my little supply to that of the girls I see posting on mom boards with bottles overflowing from the milk they pumped at their morning session.  Yes, I am hard on myself when people post pictures of their overflowing freezer full of milk they have pumped for their little ones.  I had to pat myself on the back the first time I was able to put 3 oz in the freezer.  I currently have about 20 oz stored in the freezer, and I call that an accomplishment for me.  Every day when I put Izzy's milk in the fridge at daycare, I give myself a pep talk as I carefully place her 2 to4 oz bottles of breastmilk on the shelf next to the five bottles of milk with 4 oz each. 

Don't get me wrong, to the mamas who have a freezer full of milk, you rock!  You are a milk pumping rock star!  To the mamas who produce only enough to feed their little one the next day, you are rock stars too!  And, if you are like me and can't produce enough to keep up with your little one, but you are still working away at the pumping game, I feel your pain! 

Breastfeeding is a sacrifice.  Your attention to everything you are ingesting doesn't end the minute your baby is born.  You have to continue to monitor what you eat, drink, and the medications you take.  Yes, you can drink alcohol again (within reason).  Yes, you can eat sushi again (not that it was a huge loss for me when I couldn't).  But, if you get a cold, good luck!  No decongestants for you unless you want to watch your supply disappear overnight.  One of my mommy friends pointed out last week this was something they forgot to mention to her in her breastfeeding class and she had to learn the hard way.  Thankfully,  the neti pot and saline spray are my friends!  If you do happen to tank your supply because you took some meds you didn't know you shouldn't take or, just because you were sick, remember it will take more than a few days for your supply to come back.  Don't give up mama! 

Another sacrifice... work time.  If you are working, presumably your baby is at daycare, and you will have to pump milk for him/her to drink the next day.  Assuming you are a super fast pumping rock star and can knock it out in 15 minutes per session.  That's still 45 minutes out of your day that you have to make up somewhere.  You can go ahead and add that in to the time you think about getting a workout in or enjoying a peaceful lunch.  Lunch for many is enjoyed while attached to the milking machine.  Fear not, as a breastfeeding mama you become a master multi tasker.  I realize this is also a general mom trait.  Thank goodness for hands free pumping bras.  Hint to all pregnant ladies reading this who plan to breastfeed.. get yourself a hands free pumping bra.  It is worth every penny.

A sacrifice not mentioned in breastfeeding classes at the hospital?  Your relationship with your significant other... as you sit awake at 3 AM while your little one nurses for what feels like the 50th time that night, you try not to shoot daggers out your eyeballs at your partner while he blissfully snores away.  You can't be mad at him because it's not like there is anything he could be doing to help; he doesn't have the magic boob with the good stuff in it.  But, that doesn't mean you can't hate him for getting an uninterrupted nights sleep.  However, God help the man who wakes up the next morning complaining about being tired.  Those daggers we contained the night before might just be launched.

Other things they don't tell you in class, or perhaps don't emphasize enough.... the nipple pain involved.  Granted, it should only be for the first week or first few weeks while your nipples get used to having a tiny human attached to them at all times.  But, for those few weeks... torture.  Maybe it was just me, but I don't think so.  Nipple cream is your friend. A word of caution, it's greasy and will stain your clothes. Yes, I have a few nightshirts that now have grease circles on them.  It's really the least of my worries at this point.  Also, small round ice packs.  Yes, I walked around with them shoved down into my bra many nights those first few weeks.  If you haven't figured it out by now mams to be, your first few weeks as a mommy are anything less than glamorous.  There were a few times those first few weeks that I dug my toes into the carpet as Izzy latched on.  Those would be the moments I wondered how on earth I could continue with the torture.  Luckily, it got better and the nipple pain was a thing of the past.  Until... I cut the nipple shield out cold turkey this last week and forced Izzy to latch without.  Hello nipple pain all over again.  At least it isn't as bad as it was those first few weeks. 

They didn't talk about nipple shields in my breastfeeding class, but that thing was a life saver the first three months of our journey.  There are all kinds of reasons one might need to use one.  The primary reasons being flat or inverted nipples (any dudes still reading this, I gave you fair warning not to be).  I had a love/hate relationship with our nipple shields.  I don't know how many hours of my life I lost searching through blankets on the couch or crawling around looking under furniture to try and find the lost nipple shield.  It's clear, which makes it hard to find if it falls on the floor.  I also had to make sure to have it with me any time we were going to be out long enough that I was going to have to feed Izzy.  Then there were the times the positioning of it wasn't right and Izzy would unlatch and I would get a lap full of milk; those times were not so awesome.  Again, it was super helpful in getting our breastfeeding journey off to a good start, so I can't hate it too much.

We could get into a discussion about the panic that ensues when your baby needs to eat and you are out in public frantically trying to find a place to nurse, but I will leave that discussion for another day.  I will end by saying that while breastfeeding is beautiful and the bonding time is amazing, it doesn't come without struggle.  Just know in your moments of struggle that you are not alone.  Don't be afraid to reach out to other mamas who have been through the same struggles.  They should encourage you to continue on your journey!    

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